When you finally see or run into your ex girlfriend, will you know what to do? Find out what you can do and say that will make this moment go as smoothly as possible, plus some tips on what you should do if you still want her back.
Nothing strikes harder to the very pit of your stomach than having to see an ex girlfriend when you’re still in love with her. The combination of watching her new life go on without you coupled with the bittersweet memories of your past relationship can make it extremely awkward just to be around her.
If this is where you’re at, that’s okay. We all go through stuff like this, and there are ways of keeping a level head and good composure whenever you’re around your ex.
And if you’re trying to win back your girlfriend’s heart? The way you look and act around her becomes even more important. Below are some very solid tips on how you can best impress your ex girlfriend when seeing her for the first time since the breakup:
Staying Calm, Cool, and Collected
The first thing your ex girlfriend will notice about you (beyond your appearance) is how you compose yourself. Your words and actions are important, but even more so are your general mannerisms.
Act nervous or squirrelly around your ex girlfriend, and you’re immediately putting yourself in a very weak position. She’ll smell your desperation and she’ll know that your only real motives are to win her back. This is a very bad first impression, and it’s not the approach you want to take. Therefore, you need to be extremely chill, controlled, and even confident the first time you’re speaking to or seeing your ex.
If it helps, remember that your ex is nervous too. Don’t focus on the impact of this one meeting, and try to downplay the importance in your mind. Be casual, and pretend as if you’re still dating her. Without getting romantic, address your ex girlfriend the same way you did while you were a couple. Treat is as a during a normal, everday conversation.
Putting Forth Vibes of Success and Excitement
Once you’ve settled into talking to your ex, it’s time to impress her. You don’t want to make it overly obvious, but you do want your exgirlfriend to see you as both successful and even totally thriving since the breakup.
How are things going? Things are great. In fact, they’re better than great – they’re just short of winning the lottery. Act as if getting dumped has had NO affect on you at all; your life is awesome, everything’s been great, and you’ve been having a totally fun time with friends and family. You want your ex to think you haven’t missed her one bit, your life hasn’t skipped a single beat, and that you can obviously be happy without her.
This is the opposite of what she wants and expects, and this will have a direct impact on how your ex girlfriend sees you, as well as the amount of respect she has for you. Do it correctly, and your ex will even be jealous of all the fun you’ve been having, especially since the last few weeks or months of your relationship was probably lacking that fun.
Making Her Want You Back – Being The Person She Once Loved
Try to think back to when you first asked your girlfriend out. Replay those first few dates in your mind… remember where you went, what you did, and most of all, how you acted around her.
Were you sad and depressed like you are now, or were you cool and confident? Were you alone and lonely, or did you surround yourself with friends? The point here, is that your girlfriend was attracted to you because you were new and exciting. You were fun, you were funny, and you were someone she looked up to. Why? Because you were much different back then. In those days you weren’t depressed because of a breakup; you were outgoing, energetic, and full of life.
By making these same traits a part of your daily life TODAY, you can easily reattract your ex girlfriend. Those residual feelings and emotional bonds she’s trying to bury for you can be brought right back to the surface. This type of thing renews the spark that ignited your original relationship, bringing your ex back to a time when she couldn’t stand to be without you. Your attitude is a huge part of whether or not you can win your girlfriend back, so make sure you give her nothing but positivity and charisma.
Seeing Your Ex – What To Say and Not Say To Her
In the case where you’re face to face with your ex girlfriend for the first time since breaking up, you’ll need to be careful with your words. You don’t want to seem overly anxious to see or hear from her, so you can’t use phrases like “I’ve missed you” or “I think about you a lot”.
Those types of phrases work in the movies. But in real life? You’re going to scare her off. Your ex is immediately going to put her guard up, because she now knows your motives. She now knows you’re still holding the torch for her, and will probably still try to get her back.
Instead, it’s always good to let your ex do most of the talking. Be vague and even a little bit evasive about yourself, and keep turning the conversation back to her. This will create mystery – another important part of making your ex want you again. It also gives her the chance to keep talking about herself, which will allow her to open up.
Never, ever, EVER mention your past relationship… especially if your breakup went badly. The subject of you and her as a couple should never come up. Any mention of the breakup will instantly raise alarms in your ex girlfriend’s mind, and if you don’t want her putting up her entire line of defenses you should steer clear of mentioning this at all costs.
Step by Step Methods That Will Help Get Her Back
Seeing your ex girlfriend after the breakup is only one of the many steps in the reconciliation process. If you’re having trouble getting to this point, you’ll need to learn what to do beforehand. Laying out a roadmap for success is always better than just trying to wing it, and will always give you the best the chances of reversing your breakup.
Mark Sandman – Morphine
Image by goodgovernor
Such a great great show. I never had a chance to see them after this show and about a year or two later Mark died. This was taken at the old Black Cat right before there last album came out. They played a song called "Women Are Dogs Too" that I haven’t been able to find, or they changed the title of it and it’s on that best of album I haven’t heard yet. Or it’s on there last album that I bought years ago that was swiftly stolen by an ex-girlfriend. I never bothered to buy it again. It makes me sad just thinking about it. Morphine, they rule harder then just about any band you listen to. Rest in Peace Mr. Sandman.
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